Atypical mistakes in a seducing
This article is written not for beginners. Here we won’t answer the questions “how to approach and get acquainted?”, “what to tell?”, “how to be pleasant?”, “how to tempt?”. Readers of this article have answered for themselves this banality for a long time.
Most of guys who at us study pass a similar way. In the beginning they study technicians. We speak about rules of approach, rules of creation of the first phrase, communication on appointments, the uvozakh and passings of resistance of the last moment. Children master these technicians, they have first results, and together with them confidence gets stronger that technicians solve everything.
At some point, sooner or later, these technicians don’t work. The matter is that our technicians do two simple things: strengthen your advantages and cover your shortcomings. But only only cover — up to the end these shortcomings don’t leave anywhere. Also there is a situation when the guy owning all these technicians fails. Their shortcomings were more important for the girl, than strength of all the technician. There is a kickback of the first level.
Having got on some time to a stupor, having consulted to us, guys draw right conclusions: one pickup butters no parsnips, it is necessary also normal to become the man: grow on career, to learn something new, to communicate with interesting people, to develop. Through some time, having fairly worked, our heroes receive the dividends: on them more and more qualitative girls begin to be conducted. And as they already possess the necessary technicians and knowledge, these dividends settle in their beds.
Guys are happy: they and on life became stronger, and girls have received. In their head very clever thought is born and gets stronger: technicians — for beginners, the main thing — to be themselves. And soon, if guys remain in a game, they are waited by kickback of the second level. This kickback isn’t connected with the level of skills, experience, a social status in any way and so on. Rather this kickback is mix of laziness, slackness (in sense of laxity), star fever and temporary loss of self-checking. Actually, there is also a wish to talk about this kickback: about signs of this kickback and about mistakes which guys make.
At some point guys allow a thought: of course, all women are identical, but this seems to me special, and to her other approach is necessary. And guys cease to play the game.
Classical situation: you in club have got acquainted with the girl who is much more nice, than the others. Or it is dressed more expensively, than the others. Or has told you that has arrived by very expensive car. And you begin to act more carefully, being afraid to frighten off her. There is a wish to tempt her for certain.
Your care passes into a stiffness, you begin to think too much over each action or the word, to smooth acute angles, to be afraid to pin up too vulgarly… and gradually you slide in the TFNA model. Just you have wound for yourself her importance and became the hostage of this high importance.
What to do: to call the friend, accurately and in detail to explain a situation, to tell, what are you doing and what the result turns out. To ask council of the friend and for 100% to execute his council. From outside it is very well visible when you depart from the game.
Guys consider that all others aren’t worthy women around. That they either dads, or mazhor, or handsome men and so on. Progress of the competing parties are especially jealously perceived.
In the resort there is always a certain opposition between visitors and local. And all spend forces not only for that at with women everything was good, but also on “to play a dirty trick on the competing organization” though, as a rule, girls are enough for all with a stock.
In the head foolish thoughts in style “for today I have an option, but there is a wish both for emergency for tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, and these competitors in my territory spoil raspberry” climb.
What to do: the patched-up peace is always better than a kind quarrel. It is better to be on friendly terms with competitors, together to hang out, adjust each other girls. And the level of proficiency in skills will very quickly sort things out: everyone will receive those women whom he deserves. If you receive following the results of not those women, there is an occasion to think.
100% – want efficiency. Are fixated on sex.
Whatever abrupt you were, sooner or later at you there will occur failure: unsuccessful dating, unsuccessful approach. These failures influence your self-assessment. At best failure will spoil your mood for small time. In the worst — can drag on and develop into kickback.
Though we also say that from failure nobody is insured, on the contrary, all who practice, are doomed to these failures. However the self-assessment at children all the same suffers because of these failures.
What to do: to concentrate on the progress. Mentally, voice or in writing to begin to list this progress. Quickly enough failure will begin to grow dim against the background of other progress.
Begins to trust in signs.
Many children have “happy” shirts, pants, socks, jeans, rituals. It is worth understanding that in rituals there is nothing terrible: they can adjust on a positive, load with energy and mood. But it isn’t necessary to overestimate the importance of these signs too.
If you put on too often the happy shirt, it will lose a trade dress sooner or later. You in her will look good already not so, but will still trust in the mascot though this mascot has boomerang effect for a long time.
What to do: hope for god and itself. No mascots will replace a good game. Pay attention not to in what you are dressed, and on the manner of communication, feedback from friends and girlfriends.
Begin to blame other people for the failures.
Periodically in parties there is dismantling: someone hasn’t absolutely successfully joked, someone has offended foreign girl. If such things occur against the background of your failures, you begin to blame other people for the troubles. Instead of going and getting acquainted with the new girl, you begin dismantling.
After such dismantling you often begin to be angry even more with the companion, mentally to damn him, go in cycles in the occurred (negative) situation even more and cease to play.
What to do: if already you were prevented, you can talk to the companion and state the “фи”. But only next day and on the sober head. Now it is the best of all to replace the place of the stay and to continue to enjoy women’s society.
Feel like losers in situations when do everything correctly.
The seducing is a probabilistic process. You can’t affect everything. The girl can have a guy, can suddenly begin monthly, call at the wrong time mother and report unpleasant news.
There can be a situation when it is forced to make the choice between the company of the friends and passionate in the night from you. Not always this choice will be in favor of passionate night — it knows friends long ago and to it to live and communicate with them further.
What to do: if you consider that skill will always win against circumstances, it is forced to upset you — if you in a game, similar failures were, is and precisely will be. And at each of us. And how quickly you are able to endure these failures and again to enter a game, there is one of important aspects of skill.
Having read the book or article, having watched video or having attended a training, considers that has mastered everything and everything is able.
Our basic trainings have duration about one month. Even at the exit it is required to children even one or two months to integrate into itself gained skills and knowledge. Basic, I will repeat, skills and knowledge.
At the same time most of children after the first step consider themselves masters of a seducing, begin to register in supports in advance or even to be interested how to become the pickup trainer. Upon usually these children merge after the first serious failures. And these failures surely will happen.
What to do: draw conclusions about the level only on the basis of practical results. Here at us everything is simple: there was a kiss or not, has kept the appointment or not, there was a sex or not. The result has to be stable throughout rather long time. A minimum — half a year.
Thank you for your attention. Have a good time!